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Rocks and geology aren’t the first things that come to mind when you think of puns and jokes.
So are you ready to laugh until your bedrocks with our collection of great jokes and funniest rock puns? Don’t take them for granite!!
Table of Contents
Some Rock Puns
1. My sediments exactly!
2. Have a gneiss day.
3. My rocks are gneiss, don’t take them for granite.
4. May the Quartz be with you.
5. It’s a hard rock life.
6. Rock on.
7. Some jokes just fluorite over my head.
8. This foundation is rock salad.
9. Rock was magma before it was cool.
10. I really hate rock puns. My sediment exactly!
1. Geologists are down to “earth” people.
2. Geology rocks, I really dig it.
3. Kiss a geologist and feel the earthquake.
4. Geologists have their faults.
5. Geologists can be very sedimental.
6. Geologists never lose their luster!
7. Geologists dig Mother Earth.
8. Geologists get their rocks off.
9. Geologists do it on the rocks.
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10. Geologists make the bedrock.
11. Geologists don’t wrinkle, they show lineation!
12. Old geologists never die, they just recrystallize
13. Geologists will date anything.
14. I had breakfast with a geologist because it rocks.
Rock, Stone and Geology One-Liners
1. I wish I was a little boulder.
2. I’ve hit rock bottom.
3. Rock the boat
4. Leave no stone unturned.
5. Stone-cold sober.
6. A stone’s throw away.
7. Rock candy
8. Between a rock and a hard place.
9. You know you’re getting old when… You sit in a rocking chair and can’t get it going!
10. Geology rocks but Geography is where it’s at.
11. So let’s start with a clean slate!
Great Rock Jokes
Here are some great rock jokes that will have you rolling with laughter!
1. What do you call a rock that never goes to school?
A skipping stone!
2. Why did the tectonic plates break up?
It wasn’t her fault, but there was too much friction between them.
3. What do you do with dead geologists?
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4. Where do rocks like to sleep?
5. Why was the sedimentary rock extra cheap?
Because it was on shale.
6. Who is a geologist’s favorite band?
The Rolling Stones.
8. What di the metamorphic rock say during the test?
This is too much pressure.
9. How did the geology student drown?
His grades were below C-level.
10. How do geologists like to relax?
In rocking chairs, of course!
11. What do rocks eat?
12. Bill’s house was rocking last night, everyone got stoned.
Too bad Bill didn’t have avalanche insurance.
13. What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano?
I really lava you!
14. When were rock puns funniest?
During the stone age.
15. What did the motivational speaker say?
Don’t take life for granite.
16. Why can’t minerals ever lie?
They’re always in their pure form.
17. Why shouldn’t you lend a geologist money?
They consider a million years ago to be recent.
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18. You want to hear the best rock puns?
Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
19. Why shouldn’t you let a geologist drive your car?
Because they get hammered and stoned.
20. What do you call a can of soda found in a conglomerate?
21. What fruit contains Barium and double Sodium?
22. Why was the geologist expelled from Reform School?
He was a dirty layer!
23. Why did the toddler chew on pebbles?
He wanted to eat rock candy.
24. Why are geologists no fun at parties?
They like to be stone-cold sober.
25. Why should you never tell jokes about radon, cobalt, and yttrium?
They are just too CoRnY.
Facts About Rocks
Metamorphic rock – These are rocks that have been put under a lot of pressure and heat. The pressure and heat can be made by the Earth’s movements – it moves all the time! Two examples of metamorphic rock are slate and marble.
Volcanoes – There are 18 volcanoes in the US with the potential to erupt again, all of them in Alaska, Hawaii, and the West Coast states.
Gems – Rubies and sapphires are the same mineral – corundum. The chemical formula of corundum is A1203, but traces of iron stain the mineral red – ruby, while traces of chromium or titanium stain the mineral blue – sapphire. Both these gems are rarer than diamonds.
California – The Gulf of California is a spreading zone. Many millions of years from now, it will be an ocean.
San Andreas – The earth is slipping along the San Andreas fault at a rate of about 2 inches per year. In about 15 million years Los Angeles and San Francisco will be neighbors.
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The Final Thought
Still think rocks aren’t funny? Really? We think that geology rocks! Sorry had to get the final one in. Hope we have made you smile today! Have a good day!